Make My Day, Groundhog

It’s Groundhog’s Day and boy did I see my shadow! What? It’s getting bigger every year? Say that again and I’ll take you out. I’m getting bigger every year because I keep going on diets. Then I fall off the wagon and wallow around in the mud … chocolate mud. Then I get mad … automatic weapons mad. Inside this … Read More

I Miss My Waist

A waist is a terrible thing to waste. I can’t find mine. I can’t even find where it used to be. Especially since my husband did a chore for me. I asked my husband to put a full length mirror in the bedroom so I could check out an outfit before I wore it out of the house. As usual, … Read More

The Michelin Man in Drag is … Me!

My self-image is good — too good. In fact, I look like the Michelin Man in Drag. I sort of knew this, but it was slammed home to me when a five-year-old boy asked if I was having a baby. Ouch. I also got a wake-up call when I tried on clothes, and there was a tubby woman in the … Read More

AMERICAN CORPULENCE

As everyone who has been outside their home in the last year knows, Americans are too fat. Some of us are fluffy, some are well-padded, and all too many of us are sofa-sized. I plead to fluffy, trending to (and from) well-padded. Aside from the obvious imbalance between intake and exercise, no one knows exactly WHY we are so fat, … Read More